#if people buy them she makes money and if people dont she gets to eat the leftovers a winning business strategy
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Day 3474 - 25 March 2023
🌭..?
.//projectTiGER
#projecttiger#vocaloid#hatsune miku#vflower#meika hime#meika mikoto#doodle#if people buy them she makes money and if people dont she gets to eat the leftovers a winning business strategy
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Love, Pain, Death, Repeat II
Navigation | Marvel Masterlist | Part I
Pairings: Dark!Wanda Maximoff x F!Reader, Billy and Tommy Maximoff x Mom!Reader, Agatha Harkness x F!Reader (platonic)
Summary: Why can't you understand? You were hers, and you will always be hers. You are her solemate. What you don’t understand?
Warnings: Dark!Wanda, mention of cheating, mention of death and suicide, stockholm syndrome (not sure about this one)
Wc: 1550
A/n: Im looking for beta reader (i dont have friends for this😔).
Btw If you saw other post i published before this.. NO YOU DIDNT. It was a dream, and lets keep it that way <333
“Boys, go downstairs, I think mommy doesn't feel very well and I need to take care of her today.” Her voice is soft, opposite of what you heard last time you saw her.
Your kids, you assumed, get off you. One in a green shirt whispered something to the other one, and they started running. They looked like a perfect mix of you and your ex. Something you really wanted to have. Even as you were younger you always wanted to have your prince charming, and few kids. After a few years, the only thing that changed was prince to princess.
“Why I am here? Is this hell?” After learning that Wanda cheated on you, you started feeling like you don’t deserve love or even kids.
“Aren’t you happy? We can have everything we want here! No Natasha, no Vision, no other people we know.” You looked at her disgusted. She made you believe that you’re not enough, and now she wants to build a dream, more like a nightmare to you, about you and her and your kids.
“Why me? Why not him?!” In a second she was next to you, her hand on your mouth.
“Keep that mouth of yours quieter. We Don't want boys to be suspicious, right?” Her green eyes always made you melt, and she kept her hand on your face. You wanted to give in, but decided to push her away. “Behave” She mumbled sitting next to you.
“Tell me, why me? He truly loved you, as much as a bunch of wires could love someone.” She started stroking your hair.
“It was all just about mind stone, it was all that made me interested in him. I needed to understand this, you are my true love.” Tears falling from her eyes. You couldn’t decide if they were real, or she only wanted to make you forgive her.
You faced the wall not wanting to look at her any longer. She left without saying anything more, after a while she came back and left breakfast on the bed. You were scared to eat it. Who knows if she didn't poisoned it. After a few days of staying in the room and only going to the toilet you decided to finally go to the kitchen to fix yourself something to eat and come back to the bedroom. You started learning her routine, most of the day she wasn’t at home. Taking boys to the school, and going straight after that to work. Boys.. Tommy and Billy, you learned their names yesterday, are coming back from school by foot. Wanda always comes back in the evenings. You need to share bed with her. Feeling her hands on your body makes you feel disgusted and at the same time safe.
“Mommy! Do you feel better now?” Little boy asked. You feel teats building in your eyes, as you looked in his own, almost the same color as yours. Every look at boys is tearing down your walls. Every look at them makes you question what you protect yourself from?
“Yeah Tommy, Mommy feels better now. Do you and your brother want something to eat?”
“Mom was giving us money to buy food at and after school.” He confessed. “But.. Today I bought something else.
“ Tom…”
“But wait!” He runned to his room and came back as fast as he could. Holding something behind his back he looked at you with puppy eyes. “Please don’t be mad, I just… I wanted to buy you this! “He gave you a few flowers. Your favorite flowers. “I wanted to make you feel better, and mom told me you love these!”
You wanted to cry really hard. Feeling a knot in your throat you decided to kiss his forehead and take flowers. You put them in the first vase you saw and started searching for things for pancakes.
When Wanda came back home, the first thing that hitted her was the smell, and just a while later boys came running to her, mouths full of food, and telling her you made them pancakes. She smiled nodding at their words. Everything she could think of was you, and how close she must be to finally break you.
Day after day, you were getting closer to the boys. To Wanda you were closer to breaking point. You even started making dinners for boys. For them you even started learning how to cook. After a few weeks of making dinner only for them you also started leaving something to eat for Wanda. You could not talk to her, but you didn't want her to make herself food after a long day of work, and the voice inside your head wanted her to tell you how good your dishes are, how proud of you she is. Today you decided to bake pizza. Boys wanted to help you but it ended up in flour fight.
“And how will I clean it?” You asked looking at Tommy who has all his hair white, and Billy who has his face in white powder.
“Well, mom can help!” Said Billy.
“Well, maybe I can.” Her voice made you shiver. You looked at the clock, she was home earlier. “Boys, go clean yourself before you eat, maybe we can even watch something together.” They hugged her and speeded to the bathroom.
You wanted to call for them to come back. Staying with Wanda in one room was the last thing you wanted to do right now. After the conversation on the first day you woke up here, you never talked. You didn’t want to hear her voice, you were scared. Not only things she could say, but you could actually brake and fall in her arms.
“What do you say sweet girl, want my help?” She gets closer to you. “Or you maybe want to help you also with something else?” You felt her knee between your legs. Oh how long you weren’t touched down there. Knocking on the door saved you from answering. Wanda only huffed and went to see who disturbed her.
“Hey sweetie! I just wanted to ask if you have some sugar. You know, it's late, and all the shops are closed.” After a while an older woman came into the kitchen.
“Love, why don’t you give our neighbor some sugar.” Wanda said. You only nodded. After a few seconds you were handing a stranger a cup of sugar.
“Thanks honey, oh, i forgot to introduce myself, Im Agatha” She said sweetly. You felt hope, maybe she also knows this world is fake. Maybe if you and her get to know each other you could stop Wanda. You saw a spark of hope and didn’t want to give up not now. But Wanda answered faster than you could think about anything you could say.
“And that's Y/N, she's not very talkative, selective mutism.” She lied without stuttering. You hated her almost the same as you loved her. You couldn't fully hate her, everyone but not her.
You looked into the woman's eyes with a pleading look. You didn’t care Wanda could see that, you only hoped Agatha would understand you. Soon the dark haired woman left and Wanda was again next to you. Her face is millimeters of yours.
“What would you say If I give you another child, hm? You weren’t here when boys were small. “Her lips are almost touching yours.”
“Ew! Moms!”
You were glad Billy finally came back. Thanks to your luck for saving you from Wanda twice. Rest of the evening went nice. You fell asleep while watching a movie. Every night you hoped that she would spare you, she would finally give up and let you be free. Oh how wrong you were. Wanda had plans for you, she needed her pretty girl, and no one could change her plans.
Agatha came a few times when Wanda wasn’t at home. You talked to her trying to see if she also knows if this whole world is fake. When you weren’t sure and asked her about this, she said she knew very well about what Wanda did, she wanted to save you. And she tried. You had everything planned, everything seemed so easy. But one day Agatha disappeared. She no longer came to your house, she wasn’t at home. After a few weeks new neighbors moved in.
And the day when you couldn't take it anymore came earlier than you expected. When Agatha wasn't there anymore you lost your last hope. No one could help you. There was no one else knowing about what Maximoff did. When you opened your eyes and saw the mother of your childs getting ready to work you had decided. Slowly going behind her you hugged her.
“Thank you for what you did for us Wands”
#Spotify#marvel#wanda maximoff#lgbtq#lesbian#wanda maximoff x you#wanda maximoff x reader#wanda maximoff x female reader#wanda maximoff angst#dark wanda maximoff#dark wanda x reader
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BESTIE IF U DONT DO THIS REQ N I WILL FACKING EAT UR MUTUALS
DAZAI WITH A SISTER DAZAI WITH A SISTER DAZAI WITH A SISTER!!
she has black cat energy and err makes suicidal jokes here and then but never does t and chuuyas always the one who pulls her away from dazais tendencies because he DOES NOT want reader to follow dazais steps and err dazai and reader have a 2 year gap and err basically dazai took her away with him when he left and thats were she sort of stopped talking BECAUSE BOOM CHIKA BOOM ODAS DEATH LEFT HER MORE TRAUAMATIZED THAN THE KIDS ASAGIRI BLEW UP!!! so errr crack and chuuya and reader is ummmm AHEM AHEM AHEM (cough coug)
AND BASICALLY MORI HAS THIS like obsession of bringing reader back to the mafia like he constantly says stuff like "Dazai, my offer still stands but please remember that i would really really love to see your dear sister back first" LIKE YKNOW WHAT I AM SAYING???????????
DAZAI AND HIS YOUNGER SISTER!
Sypnosis: you are the younger sister of Da-dazai! Is he a great brother or not? UPPP TO YOU! >< oh and maybe hide your secret vists with chuuya please!!
Genre: crack and heavy angst! (dont question it)
Warnings: suicidal themes! cans of gasoline, glitter bombs, reader is very quiet type, manipulation (for good use!)
A/N: yummy yummy
uh oh! this is gonna be so damn messy
so um first of all! i really think reader would be very intelligent like dazai like oh fuck! i just got under a whole rubble of rocks by some guy who btw is the enemy of my brother quick! think of something
and then theres this bsd aesthetic plan you make and just survive! to the shock of your horror... :D
okay but in all seriousness! he defiently jokingly gave you his suicide guide to if u ever felt inspired by him
VERY VERY NORMAL BROTHER ACTIVITY!!1
dazai stop influencing people around you to plug off them self challenge impossible: GO!!
if you do however join his meticulous activites kunikidas actually going to blow up
😇
but imagine how cute it would be a black cat energy young sis and a golden retriver brother like bish forget romantic relationships like dazai who sometimes forget he left his sister at work!
but ynkow mf dazai always wants to keep close to you because he was never really there (like my fake as friends🙄) back in the mafia! woohoo
so now you can asks him for whatever you want but now he actually feels guilty because you have now become the silent type and dont really talk that much
Great job dazai! best brother everr!❤️
Imagine running away from the mafia with ur lil sister then realising she doesnt even want to talk anymore and that you might actually failed as a big brother even after buying her a whole lotta stuff
COULDNT BE OSAMU DAZAI GUYS!!!
tell him to take you to an amusement park and he will! but dont be surprised if you see him trying to run to jump off a bridge because he does not have for the sake of god any money!
AYY dazai cosplaying toji to get milk? real or fake??? find out here!
dont click on the link :3
ANYWAYS he definetly tries his best to get you back to talking sure the only thing he could do is talk to himself with you beside him doodling some stuff but yknow...it genuinely makes him form a sad smile when he gets reminded that maybe if he were a better brother and actually comforted you it would have ended better
"I saw a cat today yknow! it had a black eye and orange patterns. Somehow it looked wise" dazai said relazing on the chair, his hands behind his head, the whole night of yokohama was quiet only the flicker of the dim light placed underneath the balcony ceiling could be heard.
The night was calm too, it had a soft storm-like feel to it. Dazai knew you were listening thats probably why he would talk to you all these months, no one else was there for him anyway. So its better than nothing.
All of a sudden amdist the silence several pokes tapped on his shoulder which made his eyes widen slightly. You held up your sktechbook infront of his face, a bunch of doodles of him and a full sketch of his side profile
"(Name)... This is amazing! Wow you could be a talented artist yknow!!" he said you didnt know whether he was just flattering you or not because of the emptiness in his eyes. Depression changes a person. But the slight flicker of light in his made it visible to your loud mind. Dazai was glad you made some progress.
Okay now hb your interactions with da agency??
I am pretty sure both you and him joined da agency together (gotta make sure his sister ACTUALLY doesn`t follow his steps!😋😋😋😋)
kunikida may act all cold around you and view u as some kid especially when you randomly make the most random ass suicidal jokes in the middle of a meeting but...
Lets say he sort of checks up on both of you every morning! cant let the dogs out now kunikida! you never know what they do....
iykwimyk
now yosano girlypop is the only person who shows genuine concern for you when you get hurt why? because she was bamboozled when she found out you are dazais sibling like
"huh- are you actually capable of being a brother? more so having family"
dazai be at the corner weeping because of the amount of slander
DESERVEDDDD😍😍😍
I can totally see fukuzawa patting both of you and dazais head after you two collaborated on a mission
IDWGDHYWDFYUDFILOVEFATHERRELATIONSHIPS
he prob randomly call you for tea i mean not too randomly but he likes your black cat energy
speaking of which ranpo and you bully da heck out of criminals before they ultimately mistake you for some god!! /nj
kenji and kyouka just chills around you and tries debating what you and dazai have in common.
belonging in the mental asylum. thats whats common between you two/nj again😁😁
With chuuya
NAWWWWH BRO NAWW☠️
Chuuyas gonna end upl like this emoji☠️☠️☠️
Okay maybe i am over exaggerating this but yknow dazai is like really smart
UNFORTUNATELY!!!
So he will definitely know when ever you two act a little🤭😝😘🤗😍🥰👍
Hes going to get tjat expression from chapter 114 and chew chuuyas expensive tuxedo!!
I bet after he finds out hes straight up going to give chuuya a flashback of stormbringer era!! 😍😁
#verynormalbrother
"W-w-w-what da SKIBIDI [name]??? YOU WILL NOT AND NEVER MEET CHUUYA AGAIN" "wow... and i thought you were trying to become a better brother :(" "YOUNG LA- i-" ":("
He was about to say lad
like manipulative ass brother like sister ig! :33333333
He prob had suspicions back in the mafia especially because of how you mostly stuck around chuuya when he wasnt there
YOUR FAULT BRO!!!
And then u rizzed chuuya up with double black eyes (get it?)
"You know [name] it still hurt me, though i promised i would never say it infront of your face but.." Chuuya said seriousness in his tone looking at you eyes "But please stop looking at me with those cat like eyes they deeply remind of someone and I DO NOT like it"
He ended this funny note with a genuine fear and irritation in his eyes. you only nodded and continued to stare at him, your eyes rivaling a black hole not that hole by the way.
A tingling feeling gathered in himself as chuuya looks at your blank stare "Dont look at me like that!" he raised his flustered voice, a small hue of pink appearing on his cheek which only grew as you held on to his sleeve, snuggling against it like a cat.
But before he could be more flushed a really dark aura crept up behind you and then, right then you knew you fucked up bad.
"i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-cant believe this!" your brothers voice perked up behind you genuine horror on his face as if he just saw his bestfriend die infront of him twice.
"Oh my fucki-" chuuya sighed, both of you are caught. "[name] ICANTBELIEVETHISOMGIAMGOINGTOENDMYSELFLIKEMYOTHERVERSIONFROMANOTHERUNIVERSEWHOLOWEREDYOURSTANDERDSICANTBELIEVETHISHIT" dazai rapped at super speed, an anger and shock unwordable enough for you to be confused at whatever hes yapping about. "DAZAI what the fuck??" now chuuya was confused too.
"ANDYOU, HERMANADAPUTA (sisterfucker in english) YOUUGLYSHORTMFWITHNOFLAGSNONOTHING,YOUTRUSTISSUED?IWILLGIVEYOUPRISONFORLIFEISSUES" "WHAT IS YOU BROTHER YAPPING ABOUT?"
And all you could do was watch in horror as the scene unfolds infront of you. But safe to say you got in big trouble when you went back home!
anyways dazais going to go full on 8 cans of gasoline on the portmafia if more is obsessed with you like him
and then you realised..
"fOr tHe fIrSt TiMe iN fOrEVer" he actually did/nj
Okay okay but in all seriousness (litearlly @justcallmesakira catchphrase guys!!) Dazai would genuinely become more protective of you if mori was targeting towards you.
i would run away to antarctica too if mori even tried interacting with me
SHES A RUNNER SHES A TRACKSTAR!!!!!🏃💨
But if you are intelligent then i guess you met fyodor too? And maybe some sort of rivalry goes on between you two like "oh its my brothers enemy, gotta help my bro blow him up!"
I have nothing much to say because dazai would make secret plans (which you alrdy know) to make sure mori doesnt get too close with you
Like oh he was planning to approach you that day? BOOM dazai is already there. Yeah like that
If mori says that however... Dazai will reply with a dark eyed gloom,tilting his head back creepily "You will have to need more then the whole of port mafia to interact with my sister"
Dazai hates mori alot and though he knows that you are old enough to handle situations that doesnt mean he wont care for his only sister. You are the only thing left that he can protect without feeling inhumanity or faraway.
A/N: HATE THISSSS NOOOUUU
Tags: @inojuuy @biscuits-spooky-corner @terururuko @little-miss-chaoss @saelique @silverbladexyz @typcallysid14 @nezuko-kamado-cute-demon
#sakira!#bungou stray dogs#bsd#bungou gay dogs#bsd x reader#chuuya x reader#chuuya nakahara#chuuya bsd#dazai with a sister#bsd siblings#siblings#dazai x reader#dazai x reader platonic#platonic love#family#bsd fic#bsd hcs#crack#bsd crack#bungou stray dogs x reader#bungou stray dogs fanart#tw: mori#mori ougai#sakiras writing notebook!!!
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Okay I wont get to work on this any longer tonight so imma just post this
So this morning I have realised some stuff about my Macaque home hc
So first of all you can see the human disguised Macaque with Bai He,
and so Bai He wasnt there or "planed into the house" three days ago, but I decided that, that just wont do, I want her with Macaque, so im going to have to go back and alter my original ideas so it would fit the concept of Bai He also living there with Macaque (I have quit a lot of ideas for that, but ill get to them when I have the time)
But its not the main reason I wanted to talk about this even with half finished ideas under constructuion in my head
The big thing you already saw the random old lady and the antic Store/shop, so its no suprise im going to talk about that a for a bit,,, not a lot tho cuz I dont really got the energy for this
Soo--- She does not have a name, but Ill work on that, shes not fully thougt out, but nothing really when it comes to my ideas and headcanons (its kinda like eating halfbaked dough)
so shes 73 years old divorced lady running a little antic shop in the outer cirkles of Megapolis. I was thinking maybe it was her who originally selled the whole building to Macaque and rented the free space under the dojo.
She has a daughter and a grandkid (didn't decide on gender yet)
Shes kinda inspired by @/ladygreenfrisbee's oc in the fanfiction sunbreak, a snarky but sweet old lady whos not taking any shit from the brooding, shadow the hedgehog wannabe.
When she was younger she worked in a Museum in Megapolis, working with antient historical artifacts and megical weapons, but she pretty much knew everything about anything in there, with history and old stories being one of her passions,
Thus after she retired she decided to open and antic store. Even tho its an antic store, she can be one of those people that you bring an old piece of furniture or object in and they can tell you if its legit or not. She is also willing to trade and buy stuff from you if its to her likings. She's fair and not a con artist, she has just enough money for herself and thats completely fine by her, shes a simple woman when it comes to living.
She has a ton of degrees, Dr. And Phd tytels and what nots, extreamly smart and knows a lot about history and mytology and different eras of the past, making it easier for her and Macaque to connect over old stuff.
Also I was thinking, even tho she couldnt tell that Macaque was the Six Eared Macaque himself, she knew that they were wearing glamours, She studied artifects and worked with demons who were experts on the field of magics and glamours, she knows her shit
And even tho She had a decent relationshipp with Macaque I dont think Macaque would willingly let her see his true form, maybe after he was very exhausted, and injured after a fight they couldnt hold it up and were like-- fuck it who cares (maybe it was after the final fight with LBD) and she obviously knew who they were imidietly seeing his Six ears (that even tho he let her see one time hé continued to glamour like he would usually, only letting go of their human disguise)
So after that she would start asking him a whole lot of questions about the past and what was it like, carefully avoiding the questions involving the great sage equal to heaven, cuz she knew what happend from jttw
But yeah Macaque found it funny how a child and an old lady are looking at him with similar shimmer to their eyes as they interrogate him on the past
She loves a good tea and has her own little blends that calm the nerves and ease muscle pain and stuff like that. After She and Macaque became more friendly with eachother she gifted them some tea that helps him fall asleep better and relax. Macaque checked them for poison twice and couldnt find anything, but still wasnt willing to drink from them until he had a very fucked up breakdown yippeee ✌️
After Macaque lived there for some years they somewhat warmed up to eachother, they would hold little tea paties and talk about stuff (annoying husbands and divorce) after Bai He started living with Macaque these tea parties increased in numbers, sometimes the ladys grandchild joining in when Grandma was watching over them, maybe they get along well with Bai He, maybe they had a rocky begining to their friendshipp, but they warmed up to eachother and now are pretty good friends (maybe, ill think about it more)
BUT!!! this was it for now its already 2:40 am and im waking up at 6:40 so even tho I have more to say ill be going now
Bye thank you for reading ✌️☺️
#clowning ∆#clown does art#lego monkey kid macaque#lego monkey kid#lego monkey kid oc#lmk headcanon#lmk bai he#lmk#lmk oc
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aita for not buying someone with diabetes something from a vending machine, even though they said they needed it?
i, Crow(12ish at the time, young adult now, they/them) and my friend Wren (same age, she/her) were hanging out with Wrens friend, Dove (same age, she/her). i didnt know Dove at all, i only knew Wren, and Wren was besties with Dove.
we went to a place that takes care of the kids after school, its optional, kids walk to it for fun. it had vending machines, and i only had enough money for myself and Wren. Dove went up and pointed at what she wanted from the machine, and i responded "i.. i dont have enough for all of us, im sorry-"
Dove got pretty huffy and started reminding me about her diabetes (i knew about it, only barely, because i had heard it mentioned offhandedly before), and told me she needed to have the snack. i once again told her i dont have enough money for it, and i dont know her very well.
Wren reminded Dove that she could ask the people working at the after school place, because they set aside snacks and such for her and other kids who need them. i dont remember Doves response, but i know she wasnt happy about it.
i dont think about this often, but when i do, i really wonder if i shouldve just sucked it up and bought her what she wanted. we both disliked each other for years because of this situation (me thinking she was an ass for trying to make me buy her stuff when she knew she couldve asked the people working there, and Dove thinking i was trying to let her die because i didnt want to help her.)
additional context:
im neurodivergent and am known to not trust people at all when i first meet them.
Wren didnt have any money so she couldnt have helped pay, neither did Dove.
i wasnt aware of what all diabetes entailed, other than 'you have to be careful and you sometimes need to eat certain stuff or else youll have a bad time'
i didnt know the workers gave food to people who had health conditions that needed the food, which is part of why i think i could be the asshole. if the workers Didnt give out food, i wouldve just been denying her something that couldve genuinely helped her.
im sure Wren wouldve been fine with me not getting her something from the vending machine and instead getting Dove something, but i still hadnt wanted to give Dove anything.
so, aita for not buying her something from the vending machine?
(names have been changed)
What are these acronyms?
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meg the stallion headcannons
a/n - i’ve never written for Meg before so let’s see how this goes and these are just my personal thoughts on how i think she’d be in a relationship. hope yall enjoy 😊 im not sure if anyone has done headcannons for her either.
also this will probably be a mix of sfw and nsfw but honestly it’s mainly fluff.
divider - @firefly-graphics
tags - @oceean @beautybyfire @notapradagurl7 @onyxstones-world @blkgworlamplified
you’re her plus one for EVERYTHING , no matter if it’s a fashion show, basketball game , award show she always has you by her side.
she really loves having you around, even if it’s just to sit in complete silence, she’s satisfied as long as you’re there.
extremely clingy but you love it. she either has to be near you or touching you at all times tbh personal space doesn’t exist to her & if she’s away doing shows or photoshoots you’re on call with her all day long.
“ baby we are in the house you don’t need to hold my hand “ “ what if you like disappear?” you laughed at how serious she was “ you’re cute but baby i’m not going anywhere gimme kiss “
her lockscreen is of you and her on you guys first date, and it’s been her lockscreen for as long as y’all been together and she refuses to change it to anything else.
absolutely loves spending money on you, even though half the things she buys YOU DONT NEED.
definitely surprises you with vacations when she has a decent amount of time off from work. “ my love , pack maybe 2 weeks of clothes our flight leaves in about 5 hours “ “ GIRL WHAT ?” “ y/n we don’t have time for this pack up and let’s go “
gives you all the deets on new projects or songs she’s working on, so you always know all the words to her songs before they drop & gets all the new merch before anyone else
HUGS ? megan loves hugs, every chance she gets she’ll hug you. in the kitchen cooking ? she’ll hug you from behind and kiss your cheek. coming home from work ? she’ll run from wherever she is and jump on you. you’re her comfort person.
her favorite thing to do after a make out session is resting her forehead on yours and just stare into your eyes, she always says “ you have the most beautiful brown eyes i’ve ever seen, i get lost in them everytime “
now she knows when she’s pissed you off because you’ll give her the silent treatment, but that never lasts long , she does this pout and she KNOWS that’s your weakness so the moment you look up at her face , your face instantly softens.
megan loves when u have rough day at work because she thinks it’s so cute to find you knocked out on the couch, that means she gets to carry you to bed , slip on your pajamas and bonnet and tuck you in then leave a goodnight kiss on your forehead.
her favorite names to call you are :
“ babyyyyyyyyy “
“ my loveeeeee “
“ beautifullllllll”
“ princessssss”
wifeyyyy “
She cares about you very deeply & does not play about you. The day she dropped a hard launch photo dump on instagram the hate you got was horrible. It wasn’t even coming from her fans it was other people & Megan always reassured you :
“ Dont listen to them. You’re the most special person in my life, someone i hold very dear to my heart. Those people don’t know you, they don’t know how amazing and wonderful you are. They don’t know about the love we have & fuck them !!! You my baby and that’s all that matters.
she knows how to fluster you out in public and every single time you fold.
she’ll walk up behind you while you’re mingling with friends and whispers things in your ear like “ i can’t wait till we get home “ “ you look so good i could eat you out right now “ “ we should have another round of last night “ & once megan walks away you have about 5 minutes to say your goodbyes and hop in the car
now meg may be the dominant one but she LOVES when you put her in her place. she loves when you take control
she’s a B R A T . a brat to the T ! and it’s you’re fault because you spoil the fuck outta her. so once she hears that word “ no �� it’s a wrap first she’ll catch an attitude then she stops talking to you & lastly she goes and hides in your shared bedroom until you change your mind
“ baby please let me in “ silence “ pleaseeee ill give you a kiss “ silence “ “ fine , ill buy you that chanel bag despite you having it already in every single color “ you listen as the door unlocks and she’s just there cheesin like a kid on Christmas “ thank you baby “
big baby at heart.
loves when you tell her she’s pretty in between kisses . she starts blushing then hides her face
one of her favorite memories with you is when she had a really bad day at work so you surprised her by setting up a fort with all her favorite snacks and drinks and ordered in from her favorite restaurant and binge watched all her favorite anime
A HOODIE STEALER ! especially when she travels for work all your hoodies seem to go missing.
loves that you let her be outside and enjoy her time with friends because at the end of the day she’s coming home to you. everyone thinks you should have a problem with her twerking when in reality she’s been doing it long before yall got together and it’s her favorite thing to do so why have her stop.
little does she know you already have a ring picked out for her and can’t wait till the day to make her your wife.
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grrr thinking about modern au ruetash but specifically the era where they try their hardest to not let anyone know theyre hooking up
rue times her breaks with his smoke breaks so that they can make out behind the building and everyone is confused because rue doesnt smoke? why is she taking them??
karlach 100% walks in to find rue lounging across gortash's lap and hes like "oh, she fell, dont worry about it haha"
gortash gives her his card so she can buy lunch for them and adds a lovely "get something nice for yourself ;)" at the end & rue comes back with a smoothie maker or something ridiculous
rue also does the classic "i know youre in a meeting but i must share these photos of myself i just took!" thing and times it so she knows he cant walk out or have a break. shes done it so often he knows not to open up their message thread while in a meeting. yet he does anyway and has to act cool and collected whenever anyone asks whats wrong with him
they never actually do anything in the building / his office because a) too many people around, b) security cameras are everywhere and c) his desk is too full with stuff & he refuses to move anything
they get caught eating dinner out together one evening and someone tries to use it to smear gortash's name but oh, whats that? grand duke candidate enver gortash has donated a bunch of money to fund a new orphanage? woah, thats front page news worthy! fuck the other guy who has written in about gortash being seen with someone and they think theres something shady going on - cant a man have hobbies?
going insane over them its not fair >:(
#bg3#durgetash#at any given point i am thinking about ruetash#gotta draw them in the modern au some more#ruetash#oc ; rue
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Caitlyn with a shy s/o sfw and nsfw please✊🏻
I got chu! (To all pls dont repost or reblog without crediting me)
Caitlyn Kiramman with shy S/O
Caitlyn absolutely adores you. You too first met at a party her parents were holding. She saw how pink your face was and how you were hiding in the corner.
When she worked up the courage to talk to you, you to she immediately noticed how quiet you were.
Over time she tried coaxing you out of your shell. Finally when she asked you out she decided to take it upon herself to be your own little protector.
She's so sweet, she loves taking you to secluded places. She knows you dont like being around a lot of people and she always takes that into accounts when taking you places.
You want to go somewhere but it's too crowded? No problem! She'll use her parents money and her enforcer stance to clear the place.
If you like books she'll read them to you.
When out and about she'll have a tight grip on your hand. It's her way of reminding you you're hers and that you dont need to feel shy when she's around.
Not very touchy, but along with holding your hand she'll hold you closer or wrap her arm around you to soothe you.
She understands what it's like to not like being around people so she coddles you a bit more than she would if you weren't so shy.
She'll set dates up so their secluded and have little to no one(that isn't supposed to be there) around.
Loves how pull her a bit closer when you're feeling particularly shy. It secretly drives her crazy to have you pressed up against her like that.
She definitely spoils you! I'm sorry but this woman will buy you whatever you want, whenever you want, however you want it.
She is such a fucking sugar mommy. Dont remind her though, she gets all red in the face and cant look you in the eyes.
Will watch you when she thinks you aren't looking. She smiles knowing you're hers. It makes butterflies fly in her stomach.
I cannot explain how much this woman adores how your face changes when you're somewhere you want to be. She takes you to a special restaurant, cleared of everyone but a couple staff members to serve you.
A small smile forms on your face, you're happy she thought of you like this.
Caitlyn fucking melts. My lord, the things she's going to do to you later...
NSFW UNDER THE CUT
Pleasure dom. I'm sorry but this woman will have you begging for more. When she gives you more, though... you regret asking.
She knows you're shy and uses that. She like to put you in embarrassing positions and scenarios.
She loves the idea that your heavy breathing, pink face, and wet core are all for her. She loves to remind you of your place.
She'll fuck you in front of a mirror and let you beg her.
She makes you keep your eyes open as she does it. She loves the way your eyes water and you look like you're in pain, but she knows better.
She overstimulates you without a doubt. She loves you begging for her to stop while she sits in her chair and watching you writhe on the bed.
You nee her to stop? Too damn bad. If you weren't so cute she wouldn't be doing these things.
On days where you need her to be soft and gentle shes a completely different person.
She leaves small hickeys while eating you. God does she love to eat you out. She finds your squeaks adorable.
She lays you down and spreads you out, she's so sweet with you. She can't help it, she hears you whimper while her tongue is between your folds.
She reminds herself that she needs to be gentle. She cant slut you out tonight. She isn't allowed to break you, not tonight at least.
She loves it when you squirt. I'm sorry but this woman is absolutely disgusting in the sheets. She loves you squirting because it tells her she fucked you that damn good.
"Oh, princess! I didn't know you had it in you! I'm so proud, now open your thighs up. I'm not done making your pussy mine."
And she'll say all of it with a smile on her fucking face.
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sonic and cooking head canons
sonic. no way he knows a lot of modern home cooking if any home cooking when he knows he can just buy it or have dinner with tails / amy, BUT he should know basic foraging and gathering by now and has plenty experience cooking on a camp fire.
tails. is better at meal prep then cooking or at least he thinks he is why spend so much time making 2 to 3 meals a day every day when he can just make 3 meals and increase the ingredients by 700% and save the rest for the other days of the week but he will cook somthing fresh when he has guest over, if you can consider boiled hot dogs fresh that is.
amy. she is a great home cook and will cook with cream vanilla and big from time to time, the problem is when she wants to get fancy and trys to make a new recipe and has full confidence when she is in reality way over her head, and it dosent matter what she is making she will say "and now the secret ingredient" its love the secret ingredient is love and its not much of a secret if its the secret ingredient in every thing she cooks.
knuckles. similar to sonic but has the benefit of being on the same island all the time, he doesnt have a oven or any electric equipment but he does have some primitive stuff like a mortar and pestle, plus knuckles should have a garden some where on the island yeah its over grown and poorly kept but its still a place where he can get some snacks.
cream and vanilla. these two are the best cooks in town even better than amy any thats ok because they are happy to invite people over for dinner and if you cook with them you will probably learn some thing new, also the serving sizes are pretty big as vanilla is most defiantly the tallest person in town.
eggman. in thought he is a master chief but in action he has not cooked in years think about it the food he eats is more than good enough to keep up his large shape despite all the mechanics work he does and he had to program or train his robots to cook at some point, so he know how to work a kitchen but he is so busy and he has robots that can do it for him so he probably never cooks more than once a month or even less.
shadow. he is a picky eater with a nostalgic taste in food so he knows how to cook food but nothing passed the 60s, and despite not making any thing trendy or popular he at least knows he will make some thing he will eat.
rouge. its fair to say she likes to eats high class how she gets the money for these lavish meals is well not all ways moral, but she is willing to eat some thing simple when at social gatherings most defiantly if she does not have to pay for it.
omega. I dont know if it is said or not if they have a animal powering them but if they do that bird is getting ripped(its probably a flicky) we are talking protein powder steroids fresh salad, it does not matter if its weird and maybe traumatic to feed them chicken and rice but thats what professional marshal artist eat so thats what omegas power source eats too!
charmy. he makes peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in the mourning for school days/work days and is proud of them.
espio. he is well known at the asian market and knows how to cook but does not get to learn any thing expensive or fancy ether for price and schedule issues.
vector. boy he has been trough the rough of it he knows how to feed 3 people on 400$ a month, and thats by hanging out at vanillas house.
team hooligan. bark and fang probably know some recipes but bean is a chemical fanatic one minute there making muffins and the next minute there pulling out a whole tray of crystal meth.
silver. i dont think he has a steady supply of food is most apocalyptic futures so he just likes to eat a pound of dry cement for breakfast.
surge and kit. they use to get fresh meals when starline was around, but now they got use to the effort of MREs if it takes more effort than poring water in a thermal bag then its worth the effort to just mug some one for some diner cash.
#sth#sonic headcanons#sth headcanons#sonic the hedgehog#miles tails prower#sonic#headcanon#amy rose#knuckles the echidna#cream the rabbit#vanilla the rabbit#doctor eggman#dr eggman#shadow the hedgehog#rouge#rouge the bat#e 123 omega#123 omega#charmy bee#espio the chameleon#vector the crocodile#fang the sniper#bark the polar bear#bean the dynamite#silver the hedgehog#surge the tenrec#kit the fennec#team hero#team rose#team dark
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r/akihaowners
A place for questions and conversations about owning and caring for your Akiha. For photos and videos, check out r/akihas.
14.7k masters | 19 online | Top 5% ranked by size
Posts sorted by hot
===
Topic: [Adopting] Where to Boy Akihas
u/throwaway5318008 posted 3 hours ago:
Hey guys i'm looking to buy an Akiha, but i'm a college student so i don't have a lot of money right now. how cheap can i get one for?
EDIT: BUY I MEANT BUY. FUCK I CAN'T CHANGE THE TITLE.
u/charzardass replied 2 hours ago:
Fellow boy-Akiha enjoyer detected ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) A man of culture, I see.
If you want one for cheap and don't mind buying used, check your local Facebook marketplace or Craigslist. I've been lucky enough to get several for under $50 ea. Happy hunting!
u/pm-me-akiha-titties replied 3 hours ago:
If you're a college student, the cost of buying an Akiha isn't your biggest concern. You'll need to pay for routine veterinary care, clothing, a cane (many cheap Akihas won't be sold with a cane), enrichment (Akihas don't like being left alone! What are you going to do when you're in classes?), and, of course, food? The Akiha Care Guide provides an estimate of monthly expenses for Akiha raising.
| u/throwaway5318008 (OP) replied 2 hours ago:
| Yeah i live in a dorm but its a single so i dont have roommates. And i was thinking she could just hang out in my apartment while im in class? And i can bring back food from the dining hall. So i dont think she really needs clothes or whatever if shes in my room the whole time.
|| u/knightyknight replied 1 hour ago:
|| yeah OP you can ignore that simp. some people love to spoil and coddle their akihas and then warn eeeeeeveryone how expensive they are. well of course they're expensive if you treat them like people.
|| anyways I have a buddy who's an akiha breeder so I get mine for dirt cheap. you can always try to find a breeder in your area and offer to buy the dams off them once they stop being fertile -- they'll usually sell them for next to nothing to clear up space for the next young dams. ===
Topic: [Advice] How to make less noisy?
u/SmolTaterTot posted 7 hours ago:
Hi folks. I recently bought an Akiha, and I love him to pieces! The only problem is... I don't think I was prepared for how noisy they can be. Mine's always meowing and moaning and whining all day and night. I've read the FAQs, so I tried hitting him when he wakes me up in the middle of the night, but he hasn't stopped. Any advice?
u/himejooooooshi replied 5 hours ago:
UNGRATEFUL [huffy face][huffy face] being whiny and needy is an Akiha's charm point
u/ArrowToTheNiichan replied 7 hours ago:
You done goofed. You clearly aren't giving him enough attention since he's crying all the time, so hitting him (i.e. giving him attention) when he wakes you up is just encouraging the behavior. Go back and RTFM again, specifically the part about behavioral conditioning.
But it's true that Akihas tend to be pretty loud no matter what. Some vets can remove the vocal cords for you if it really bothers you that much, but insurance won't cover it. Good luck.
===
Topic: TIFU by getting a "friendly" pair of akihas
u/sirtwixalot posted 12 hours ago:
I read that akihas need attention and get lonely easily, but they can also be intimidated by unfamiliar akihas, so I decided to buy a pair of akihas from the same breeder so that they could keep each other company.
I got them Friday afternoon, and they spent Saturday and Sunday grooming each other and wrestling together. One of them calls the other "nee-san," and the other calls the first one her "puppy." So they seemed to be getting along really well. I wasn't even having the problems with them refusing to bathe or eat that I hear sometimes happens with akihas. So I thought they seemed like really good companions for each other.
Then on Monday.... I went to work and left them at the house.
When I came back... I think I'd be banned if I described what I saw.
Imagine if a jar of mayo exploded all over a bed.
Sooooooo TIFU.
u/himejooooooshi replied 9 hours ago:
No problem detected... ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
u/SmolTaterTot replied 10 hours ago:
DUDE
u/ArrowToTheNiichan replied 11 hours ago:
Does no one actually read the FAQs before they buy one of these things anymore?
u/charzardass replied 11 hours ago:
LMAOOOOOOOOOOOO
===
Topic: [Advice] How to beat an Akiha in a one-on-one basketball game?
u/Point_Me_@_The_Sky posted 2 hours ago:
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Lol, Mars having a scarcity mindset is so true. My mom is a Mars moon, and my dad is a Venus moon. My mom is very frugal with money (she grew up poor, so I don’t blame her). She rarely spends it on herself. My dad overspends a lot, and we even have debt because of him. 🙄 He overspends on food and miscellaneous shopping. I have both Mars and Venus in my birth chart, and I agree with both of them. Like, just buy it, Mom! 😣 But I get it because she’s the breadwinner and mostly cares about the bills. My parents fight over their approach to money. My dad indulges a bit too much... He buys lots of pastries and other unnecessary stuff. He doesn’t really take care of his health and just eats whatever, which has led to health problems and physical pain. Meanwhile, my mom goes on diets and watches what she eats. She looks great for her age. I bond with my mom over health, and we make healthier meals together because I used to indulge in food like my dad but made changes. We tried getting my dad into healthier habits, but he’s stubborn AF. The difference between Mars and Venus is so interesting. I’m biased towards my mom because she’s the most hardworking woman I’ve ever known, and my dad is a couch potato, lol. This post might seem like I’m coming for my dad 😂😅 but I’m just saying what I see. 🤷♀️
this is such a good observation of Mars vs Venus energies,, the difference is sooo stark lmao
I've often noticed how really disciplined, hardworking, tough, go-getting people end up with someone who is comfort seeking, indulgent and perhaps lazy. Opposites attract yada yada but the truth is when someone is as internally organised and steadfast in their pursuits, they dont stop to enjoy the fruits of it too much and subconsciously choose partners who will do the enjoying on their behalf.
Idk if others are familiar with this but have you noticed how all the big bulky gym rat type men often pair up with voluptuous, curvaceous women? obvs its not some rule that men who hit the gym will exclusively date curvy women but i think its interesting how someone who will go to great lengths to cultivate their form will often be drawn to someone who's very relaxed, comfortable in their own skin and indulgent with their cravings (im not implying all curvy women are like this either,, just a general tendency). The more yang leaning you are, the more you crave softness in your life and the more you want to nurture someone and give to them endlessly. You want someone who is a bit hedonistic.
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Been thinking about Muri's business's relationship with Spyke's. Muri sells snails for cash, Spyke accepts snails for services. There are several things this could imply:
Muri built a large chunk of her business on her inside knowledge of Spyke's snail lust, and the only reason people buy her snails is to trade them with Spyke. This would make both services largely co-dependent, although Muri would need Spyke's business more than he needed hers. Is it a plot they concocted to boost revenue? A money laundering scheme? This, of course, assumes Spyke is unique in his snails-4-rolls business model and Super Sea Snails are useless outside of him. This, in turn, implies that Spyke is a complete fucking freak.
Spyke resells the snails he recieves back to Muri in an infinite loop. Definitely some sort of money laundering scheme. You don't want to know what their actual business is.
Urchins kind of in general have a thing for snails and regard them as valuable, due to use as food, currency or some other thing. Her selling them is just what Urchins do, as they play into the business of every Urchin entrepreneur as some sort of tradition.
It ain't that deep and Muri just capitalized on a bootleg-shilling street hobo by selling the hobo's favorite snack on a nearby street corner, knowing he's known to accept it in lieu of payment, basically pocketing his profits and letting him provide the actual services like a Chuck E Cheese token machine.
Muri knows Spyke eats Super Sea Snails, but thinks everyone does it and believes she's selling snacks. Urchins are strange.
The above, but her main gig is selling her other wares, and just sells off her surplus snails as a side thing. Perhaps the Urchins only operate businesses as a way to obtain snails, and all 3 have a dragon's hoard of illicit molluscs in their basements.
Not sure how legible this is. It's late, I'm tired, I'm trying new ADHD meds, and my brain has latched onto ur girl like a porcupine to a poorly-guarded garage sale salt lamp.
HEY ANON its been months u prolly dont care abt muri anymore so as an apology i give u never seen muri wips i will never finish. Also, ur ask gave me like tons of ideas aswell ur brain is huge. Hope u don't mind me stealing a few of these for the Muri+Spyke lore 💋
OK infodump time
(made this a while ago with inspo from ur ask!)
Muri's and her business are known by word of mouth, she has never made any advertising for it.. Inklings and Octos just went all around the splatbands saying "Theres this urchin chick that sells super sea snails at affordable price, you should definetily go buy from her if you run out of snails!!" And thats how she sky-rocketed. That and her often using her good-looks so that they buy more stuff from her. But she can't really do any gear stuff, so she sells the super sea snails so that Spyke n Murch can do the actual thing.
"Muri would need Spyke's business more than he needed hers. Is it a plot they concocted to boost revenue? A money laundering scheme? This, of course, assumes Spyke is unique in his snails-4-rolls business model and Super Sea Snails are useless outside of him." "It ain't that deep and Muri just capitalized on a bootleg-shilling street hobo by selling the hobo's favorite snack on a nearby street corner, knowing he's known to accept it in lieu of payment, basically pocketing his profits and letting him provide the actual services like a Chuck E Cheese token machine." - YAH. U GET IT COMPLETELY. IDK if this is canon or not, but i think that super sea snails are only food. Like, for urchins. They're super hard to get, but they're only food. Spyke basically made them some sort of luxury item in Inkopolis, making them look like super valuable between Ink n Octo-lings. Muri noticing this, decides to sell super sea snails knowing she'll make mad profit from that.
Also thought abt a few options abt how Muri gets the snails.
Her family "farms" Super Sea Snails back in her hometown. (which is the same as Spykes and Murchs) She takes a BUNCH of them to sell in the splatlands, aswell as to give to her two brothers as a treat
She has a super sea snail provider that (initially) gave her only a limited amount of super sea snails. Yet her being the freak woman she is, she blackmailed and threatened the owner asking to give her as much snails as she wanted. With no other choice they had to accept, making Muri the one in control of the partnership. Kinda. Because the owner tends to flee and run away everytime she wants to talk with them.. making the poor delivery jellyfish have to deal with her.
You can choose to believe which of the two whether u like the most or which one u think fits her better.
BONUS FUN FACT: Muri cannot eat Super Sea Snails because she finds them disgusting in taste after a childhood experience. (She ate too many and threw up, the taste is now sickening to her) In the present she finds them extremely adorable buut shes fine and doesnt care abt other urchins eating them
Additional Muri+Spyke stuff
OK my tummy hurts THX SO MUCH anon for the ask it made my muri brainworm infected brain go insane
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haiii ... like a week short of a month since i left everything.... i just wanted to use as Journal and catch up before i do Fully return to social media, gettin rid of the app after this post yet again:
has . been . rough. grief has been consistent the last month from my best friend and now ex leaving me, losing that new job due to being physically sick from grief and being unemployed an additional month, my best best friend my dog, sage, passed away last friday and although i left to drive to kansas i just didn't make it in time. She has wind chimes over her grave and passed listening to the sound of the wind chime my great grandma left for me. two days after her passing marked the First Full Year since my grandpa passed away, i had a dream the night before where we drove around looking at christmas lights with people no longer in my life and he just looked so so sad. i am consistently physically alone; i facetime a couple friends but i go outside alone, sleep/wake up alone, eat alone, this has been going on since i left arizona in november Most of my time is spent completely alone.
ive tried new habits. i meditate and stretch in the morning and night. i read a page a day of a stoicism book my dad got me last year with a propeller hat. i see a therapist weekly, wake up earlier, even floss now. The complete back to back to back grief has left me no choice but to just Do Something. while i would Love to share something with someone its best i reserve it to myself, yet here i am vacantly sharing my last month to who knows who...
my friend invited me to see stop making sense last night in a farther town, showed the original film not the remastered and general admission was all standing and everyone acted as if it was a real concert dancing and singing. this was my 6th time seeing it in a theater. did not cry once yet celebrated the experience i have had and although i will never have anything quite like i did with someone quite like them, at least i had it for a good portion of my life. had to devote this must be the place to myself, foreign. to be completely transparent, i do miss them every day. i do not cry like i used to, i dont let myself get consumed by thought and feeling, ive grown more desensitized as time has passed, but i still miss them of course. i consistently see things that remind me of them even when theyre not on my mind and when sage died i wanted to reach out so terribly; reminisce of the fort we built where she slept with us and i had no one to talk to but my mom who was with her til the end. i didnt. i havent reached out. it is not my place given they were the one to leave i just will not keep reaching out and chasing someone who sounded so blatantly apathetic on our last phone call. i tell myself it was just a form of self preservation to them but yknow. like. that's it, i have no choice but to experience grief with self compassion and continue on, wherever that goes.
i may be starting TMS treatment , having magnets zap my brain 5 days a week, 6 weeks. i see a cardiologist on the 30th since my chest frequently hurts and both ekgs have concerns in the pause between beats. my pulse at resting is consistently around 120 yet my blood pressure is fine; who knows. well i guess ill know actually in 10 days. im finishing a vape, got a full pack of cigarettes ive yet to touch yet plan to quit smoking here soon in hopes it helps. maybe after my pack to eliminate temptation yet not waste my money... i bought it an hour before sage passed. i barely drink coffee and dont use energy drinks anymore i do what i can for my heart now.
atticus still sleeps with me, most nights. sometimes he wanders the living room when i cant sleep. im almost halfway through galapagos. i washed my sheets for the first time since buying them in august. im very much alone and this is all fine i tell myself. the stoicism has encouraged me to alter my perspective on things more rationally as opposed to the wired self deprecating and depression-based "take everything personally" thought processes ive had for 18 years. im on my phone significantly less and i even wrote a piece on piano i may share after this post. ive been transposing it to cello, my grandma requested.
i have no interest in perusing anyone anytime soon still, whether its still too early or what i think i do just Need to do these things alone for a while. ive never found sole stability in others, i learned this at 6 with my dad, yet while outside aid would help, it is not a requirement to live however. forgive me for how long this is and for leaving once again there are a few of you i used to talk to daily and now ive just got a few contacts in my phone.
despite chronic mental illness, mourning, loneliness, you name it, ive never taken this approach before. i will typically have a suicide attempt yet here i am doing a pancake stretch and ommm-ing every morning. i keep as busy as i can, today i went through every single thing i own to sort donations and the day before i deep cleaned. there is a box wrapped in a blanket of some of the things that remind me of them. i went through it today and brought out some things like the books theyve given me, it doesnt hurt as much anymore to remember. im donating the mugs i never gave them and the one theyd use at my house when theyd come over. all their letters havent been reread yet sit in between the photo of us in the cave. it was nice to see. i am so honored they let me, of all people, share these experiences with them. i am more thankful it happened then miserable itll never happen again; at least i had it for a while. i say this yet if a year passes and i hear from them, i would love to reconnect: hear how their life has been, what they've been doing, how their family is and if they are doing better. if this has helped. while for 6 years i believed they were really it for me, whether we ever dated or not ive always considered them the only one who Really Knew who i was, how i worked, you name it. although im "moving on" by taking care of myself more, it is upsetting to admit if i ever have a chance again, id take it in a heartbeat. i say this yet still believe Even if i do never get a chance, that's okay too. While i would, i dont anticipate it, rely on it, sit in denial "theyll surely come back," its alright if they never do. i live each day as if they never will yet to my core do know that i would try again
a knee ways .. i hope you, whoever reads, is doing okay, that you feel alright and what not. you dont have to feel good every day, but at the least alright i hope ... not sure if/when ill come back maybe just once a month im unsure yet .was just in a solid enough state to do this for a moment . wish you all well ,
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HELLO!! okay lowkey i feel like we talk more through your inbox than we do in dms so im just gonna start ALWAYS talking here 🙂↕️ idk tumblr dms just don't work or something so GOOD AFTERNOON!! I HOPE YOURE GETTING A TON OF REST NESS bc tomorrow... we have to go back... sigh. and i have picture day tomorrow so i probably need to make myself look presentable ykwim?? 😞
but like about that friend i yapped about HIGHKEY SHE IS NOT IT YOURE RIGHT!!!! i think what makes it worse is whenever she thinks theres an issue between her and me and she goes to literally everyone but me about it to try to get other people to validate her?? FUNNIEST THING EVER because usually people side w me too pls 💔 like they'll defend me, and the people usually tell me when she starts yapping about it to them so like... just wondering why she feels the need to tell everyone in the world about what i apparently did wrong ⁉️ live laugh love i suppose... AND IF YOU EVER WANNA HEAR ABOUT STUFF THAT SHES DONE TO ME I LITERALLY HAVE STORIES FOR DAYS
ALSO!!!! IM SO EXCITED IM FINALLY GONNA GET MY DRIVER'S PERMIT AND START DRIVERS ED AAAA like ive been waiting for ages!!!! i had to like save up and stuff so it took a bit CAUSE WHY IS IT LIKE 400 DOLLARS IF YOU DONT TAKE IT THROUGH THE SCHOOL LIKE PLEASE 💔
its been days and the try again playlist is literally the only thing pulling me through... ness im forever grateful for the existence of this playlist‼️try again isnt even finished but like NESS i would marry it if i could i think i think about it even more than love notes omf 😭 i need yn as my therapist NOWWW!!! AND ADDING ONTO THAT, TONICS LOOKS SO AMAZING SO FAR OH MY GOD?? LIKE ALL THE DETAILS AND THE GRAPHIC DESIGN FOR ARTIST PROFILES AND EVERYTHING UGHH IM SO EXCITED
okay another thing, i think i told you about a phone vault before cause like my school was really talking it up... it was the stupid pocket thing on the wall. they're out there calling it a phone vault GOODBYE 😭 anyway ive given up on paying full attention in class and have reverted back to wearing and airpod in class so i can listen to music (the SOLE reason why i have airpods is bc they were a christmas gift i dont have enough money to buy those on my own 🫡)
ANYWAY I HOPE YOURE HAVING AN AMAZING DAY LOVE!! MAKE SURE YOU EAT, DRINK WATER, AND TAKE YOUR MEDS LATER!! <33 ILY
HELLO SAV!! AND PLEASE TALK WHEREVER U WANT!! I WILL RESPOND WHEREVER <3 and omg good luck with picture day!! 😭 literally those pics never turn out good like they PURPOSELY WANT ME TO LOOK BAD they're always like "no no!! push your hair out of your face behind your shoulder so we can really see how much of an egg you look like!!" but i'm wishing you the best of luck and that your picture turns out well 😔
and also HELLO??? I'M SO GLAD EVERYONE TAKES YOUR SIDE BC LIKE,, THAT'S JUST EMBARASSING FOR HER 😭 I HOPE SHE TAKES IT AS A SIGN AND REALIZES LIKE...maybe she's in the wrong...or maybe she should go to you and sort it out with you!! instead of just complaining about it to others!!
AND AA YAY GOOD FOR YOU!! it's def expensive but so so worth it in the end 😭😭 i remember for me (idk if every state does this!!) but i actually did my lessons when i was like 16 1/2 (for many reasons we won't get into 😔) but anyway!! in my state or at least at the drivers ed school i went to if you were that age they'd allow you to do this thing where basically they just threw all the information you'd learn over the course of the week (or however long all the drivers ed courses are) in one night crash course style!! and then u take the permit test at the end of it and then u get ur permit!! and although i felt a little behind everyone else bc i didn't start drivers ed immediately yk i was kind of glad i got it all done in one night!! and like you learn all the info and then IMMEDIATELY take a test on it so it was kind of easy!! but best of luck to u!! i hope it all goes well <3
AND AA THANK YOU SO MUCH!! I'M SO GLAD YOU LOVE THE TRY AGAIN PLAYLIST!! i always listen to it in the morning when i'm still waking up and then will switch to the tonics playlist when i'm more awake LMAOO BUT YES!! DW i think now that i've gotten tonics intros out of the way i'm gonna work on try again while trying to outline tonics!!
BUT HELLO THE "PHONE VAULT" BUT BEING THE SHOE HANGER THING?? MAN THAT IS NOT A VAULT 😭 THE WAY SCHOOLS ARE OUT HERE COMING OUT WITH THE CRAZIEST NAMES EVER JUST SO THAT IT LIKE FITS THE AESTHETIC OF THEIR SCHOOL OR WHATEVER IS CRAZY but yes!! i think my wireless earbuds were also a christmas gift or something and then during this one play during high school that was literally the bane of my existence (and also simultaneously the best play i ever did) i NOT ONLY lost my earbuds but i ALSO bit my phone on accident and then broke the screen so like...i sacrificed blood sweat and tears for that play frfr (i also bled all over the set after cutting my finger on accident so i mean it...) so i had to buy myself another pair after that bc my mom was sick of me 😭😭 but they were like an off brand pair and tbh they're better than like samsung buds!! (what i have to use bc i'm not an apple user </3) so honestly it worked out in the end!!
BUT I HOPE YOU HAVE A GREAT DAY AS WELL!! THANK YOU SO MUCH SAV <3 HAVE A LOVELY DAY AND REST LOTS AND TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF!!
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An Essay
There is a running motif of cannibalism in my stories and it's been a metaphor for a lot of things ranging from a deep loss of self that characters think they can regain by stripping others of their sense of self (ie by devouring another person) to an assertion of power of another through a sexual lense. However, I would be bereft if I did not say that in essence, cannibalism is about hunger. It is about being so hungry that you are unsure of where your mind is.
When I think of hunger I think of the 90s, of wartime that my family has gone through, of the bombs falling from the sky, and of a scarcity of food.
I think of the inflation that would make your entire paycheck that could feed your entire family in the morning equate to a pack of gums by the end of the day. I think of people singing and drinking because if they did not sing or drink or go from house to house and get food to share (like a student whose family sent cheese who shared it with his dormmates, of a man who picks up hitchikers because they dont have any money for tickets for the bus but they are going home to eat and so you will do this, because you, too, remember doing the same when you were young) they would go hungry and they would do so alone.
God forbid that the situation was ever so dire in the 90s to make anyone worry about cannibalism. It was much more likely to get shot or to be raped by people who’ve seen horrors, who’ve fled from the same horrors, who were perpetuating the horrors. But when I think of cannibalism I think of a desperate hunger. I think of dogs going hungry and walking aimlessly through the street and coming across helpless people and then I think of them being fed scraps that people are tearing from their own mouths to do so. Because cannibalism whether bestial or human, has never been about just hunger. It has always been about hungering alone.
People would ignore their stomachs to feed their children, would sacrifice and give to friends and family and it would always go around.
I think of human connection and then, I think of how far a character has to fall to feel such a deep, festering discconnect to humanity in order to commit the act of cannibalism. How alone they must be. How much they have failed at integrating with the people around them. I think of the pain of the person being eaten and of the person eating.
I think of the 90s and I think of the hits playing on the radio as hungry students go to parties and then go to the library to study. Who would go and finish exams and get taken out for beer with their professor. I think of my mother who would tell me people had to be magicians back then, to make any money last. One minute you could buy the chips for food at the university, and if you were even ten minutes late, you just wouldn't have enough money to buy anything. But she says they played cards and would go around from dorm to dorm, collecting food and eating it all together because they would all fill their puzzle, one might have cheese, another rakija, another bread, some might even have ajvar. But others will have the radio, some will have casettes of music, some might have books and cheats for the exam the following morning, and some might have blankets because it became a minus overnight and youre still waiting for your parents to send you your winterwear via a relative who doesnt have enough money for gas and is haggling for it with a neighbour.
And i think of how this would go if there was no human connection in place. I think of the dogs again and how only people who have lost their sense of community can ever commit cannibalism. I do not think of it as a solitary activity, but I think of it as one bathed in loneliness.
I think of the consequences of hunger that the first thing this generation still thinks about is food. I think of a father who leaves his wife and kids in the car because the child complained about being hungry, of the horror of remembering hunger so potently that you never want your child to feel it. That you leave the car trapped in a queue at the border and you go until you find the first house, and you come back with cheese and bread and don't say anything else. The child had food at home, it could have waited- but the memories of hunger do not wait. They are embedded in their being.
But do you wonder if he had not found the house? If there was no food? Do you think he would not have done something deeply, irreperably alienating in order to feed his child?
Do you think he remembers the 90s , too? And if he did not have anyone else, if he did not have human connection and community, he would not be able to withstand that hunger.
That's what hunger is. An occasion for community and celebration as you eat together and revel in whatever life you can make. Or it can be a trigger, a descend into a state of mind from which there is no return, a loneliness you cannot fathom that you want to rectify if only through a newfound connection to your hunger, to the alleviation of said state.
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A few things have happened recently I guess since I updated here. I again, never feel like I do art stuff. I think I'm going to order a portable keyboard for my phone so I can photodump real life photos here as well but make it easier to upload from my phone. Its just easier to type on the desktop but too inconvenient to get photos off the phone.
so I did this colorful guy the other week and this past week I decorated a pumpkin for work that actually kinda came out cute. I was actually quite aggravated with work. We had a bunch of people quit and I honestly don't know how we're still open and why am I still there? I feel like I can't really complain about it because my former coworkers before I moved tried to get me to stay in Georgia knowing my husband was about to get deployed. It kinda makes you second guess whether that was a feasible option. But I'm also kind of limited on employment options here because I'm not bilingual. I'm honestly just chalk full of excuses and hate change (as much as I love change as well). My husband assures me I don't have to work but I don't want a resume gap and I like spending money obviously.
I've slowed down my art supply purchases compared to what I've done in the past for sure but now I want to buy some new winter clothes (it was actually too cold out for me to walk my dog today, in Georgia it didn't get cold til January) and because of the Disney100 celebration theres so much Simba merch out there and I just want it T_T
My birthday was on the 27th. I had rescheduled a minor dental surgery on my birthday and had already rescheduled it once because of work needs. My coworkers begged me to reschedule again but I couldn't. They said they had plans to take me out which was nice of them. I actually had a good birthday though. I worked until 1:15 and bolted out of there so fast to make it to my 2pm dental appointment. I stole the OR scrubs and ran. Before I left they hit me with confetti cannons (which are scarily loud, I've never seen those in real life), cake, chikfila, cash, gift cards, hand written notes..it was all very nice actually. I ate my chikfila that evening my cutting it into small piece I could eat with a fork. My husband had already sent me simba earrings but he also made sure I had some simba socks on my doorstep for my birthday which was really nice. Earlier in the month my MiL sent me a simba purse she made which was really cute and my mom sent me pajamas. Also really cute. So overall a good birthday month ignoring the interesting workplace drama.
I actually finished a few books this month. Hurricane Wars and Godkiller, bless both you authors.
I also didn't think I was going to do Halloween this year but my neighborhoods exploded with decorations which makes me wonder if there will actually be trickortreaters. So I got some candy..I think Ill just leave it on the doorstep though with a sign that says "please be nice and dont take all of it" instead of passing it.
My husband is doing ok but he called me today saying he's about had it with his one coworker too lol I live for workplace drama let me tell you.
But yeah, I may update again soon.
#artblog#sketchbook#illustration#tigerart#tigers#watercolors#pastelwatercolors#painting#watercolorpainting#happybirthday#artvlog#artistlife#sketch#traditionalart#realmedia#animalart#mixedmedia#drawing#military spouse
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